I was living in London in my mid-20s when I read “Conversations with God”, a book by Neil Donald Walsh, that changed my life. Some statements especially inspired me: “If you want to know what’s true for you about something, look at how you’re feeling about it.”

It is 2011. I have just moved to New York, the city of my dreams. I used to imagine that my life would truly begin here. I have a real estate company in London. I am planning to open its branch in New York to continue in this direction.

If I really listen to my feelings in New York during the first weeks, I realise that it’s not the city of my dreams. There is no inner truth in this idea. It feels like an illusion I’ve lived for years. My life looks right, but it does not feel right.

In the meantime, what am I doing in New York? I have no interest in real estate. All my time I spend in the New York Public Library, enjoying archives of fashion magazines. My mind considers it too frivolous, even for a hobby.

I’m at an unprecedented zero-point. I have never created a product. I do not have a relevant education, knowledge, experience or anything that is considered necessary to embark on this journey. I have zero friends in the fashion world. Plus, creativity is my biggest fear.

How could I hope to create this bag? Calling myself a designer stirred up my greatest fears. Only by removing the labels about myself and the industry could I consider making my handbag. This way I felt the freedom to be who I am and not compare my path with anyone else.

Since I am at such an amazing zero point, what if this whole journey becomes an experiment? What if I create this handbag together with the Divine and apply the wisdom of “Conversations with God” to a real project?

Italy is known as the home of the finest craftsmanship. So it took me a couple of seconds to book a one-way ticket to Milan. Where to begin? The internet. I wrote an ad “I am looking for the highest quality craftsmen in Italy” and posted it on different websites.

I am confused. What if my sensitivity doesn’t work? What if I can not recognise when my soul dances? I need to connect with my very centre, to return to my deeper knowing...

But where does one find such people? From the exhibition, I had zero contacts and no idea about what to do next. Suddenly, I remembered that I still had the two contacts from the Internet.

Florence. My meeting is in a couple of days. While waiting, I start to experience a wave of doubts. In my rational mind, I realise how crazy this adventure is but then I remember how I promised myself to not believe in outer appearances and not to trust my rational mind.

I have found Geppetto, so presumably I have located my factory. Now I need a design for my bag — this is all Geppetto is interested in - but where should I obtain such a design? In fact, how do people design things in general, what is the process?

At first, I felt this store was not an accident, but when I entered, I saw nothing remarkable. I was about to leave, but I felt such emptiness inside, that I decided to stay and have a deeper look at the items on display.

So now in a hotel room. My meeting with Geppetto is tomorrow, he is expecting the design and I still have no idea how to come up with one. In the meantime, I am gazing at the briefcase that is under the bed next to mine. Suddenly it hits me — the briefcase is different because it has a sloped line!

Now I have to express this idea visually…but I cannot draw. I went to buy plasticine, paper, scissors - so I can experiment with proportions of the future bag and play with the materials like I did in kindergarten.

Inspired, I ran to the meeting with Geppetto to show him my ideal concept…and that’s where a shock was waiting for me: he told me that his production was unable to create my bag. I could not believe it. How could this be? My soul danced with him...

Meanwhile, in all the factories we visited, we had very similar experience — every element of my creation appeared impossible to be produced the way I wanted.

For the next several months, various factories tried to create my bag. I felt vulnerable and sad every time I saw another prototype that belittled my idea of perfection. As if no one had a clue what the ideal meant.

Since we had visited an excessive number of factories in the south, I was curious to explore something new — the north. Where should I begin? I still didn’t speak Italian and didn’t know where to look for the right factory.

Angelo looked like a real angel. He lived in a small town in the north of Italy, Varese. This town is a historical centre of production of unique handicrafts — suitcases, travel bags, briefcases, and hatboxes. It was incredible that such a city existed! This place seemed to be ideal for what I wanted. I discovered the treasure of Italy!